Wow! How time passes so quickly. I started this blog two years ago, wrote two posts and somehow never managed to keep it flowing. As I opened the dashboard, there are several drafts of thoughts I have started to write about and never finished. From the statistics, obviously no one has really missed my amateur writing. And likely only a handful of people will ever read this one. We will see what the future holds for any additional posts if I can manage to keep them up!
Man…my life has changed a lot over the past two years, I suppose really, all of ours has. But the past two months is really where my life has taken a turn, a major turn.
Just over two months ago I fell for someone..and I fell hard. I met them and the encounter almost instantly lit me up like a Christmas tree. The attraction was and has been intense. After the first meeting I had an overwhelming urge to get to know this person. I wanted to spend time together, be in their presence. Their smile melted me, their body created lust in me, and their touch comforted me. Even in the first meeting, the level of comfort and relaxation was unparalleled for me. I quickly had moments of wondering what a life with them could be like. We began texting daily, spent a weekend together, drove a ridiculous distance to get lunch together, and we openly and unashamedly discussed the mutual connection and feelings. And…we had amazing sex with basically no inhibition or the normal awkwardness that comes with sex with strangers.
Allow me to frame this for you if you haven’t read any prior posts or the About Me section of my blog…I am married and have four kids. At the time of writing this, my wife and I have been married for 13 years.
So my falling for someone, as you can see, is not a great thing. In fact, it is by far, the most fucked up situation I have ever been part of. I can tell you without a doubt, that the most difficult situation I have experienced in my life has been falling for him. Oh wait…did you just re-read that sentence? No, it wasn’t a typo…you read correctly, I said him…falling for him.
I don’t know what you are thinking at this point. I imagine a whole range of emotions could be experienced. Some may be angry, curious, excited, sad…like I said, not sure how each reader will “feel” this, but I ask you to stick with me regardless of how you feel. I am not a talented writer but I think that what I am going through is shared by more people than most of us realize and it is my hope that I can share a piece of what I am going through that might be able to help someone else.
It’s going to take a while for me to get this all out in writing but bear with me and feel free to communicate with me.
